Teacher: Maria, go to the map and
find North America.
Maria: Here it is.
Teacher: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
Teacher: Why are you late,
Frank: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Frank: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Teacher: John, why are you doing
your math multiplication on the floor?
John: You told me to do it without using tables.
Teacher: Glenn, how do you spell
Teacher: No, that's wrong
Glenn: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
Teacher: Donald, what is the
chemical formula for water?
Donald: H I J K L M N O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
Teacher: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
Teacher: Goss, why do you always
get so dirty?
Goss: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
Teacher: Millie, give me a
sentence starting with "I".
Millie: I is...
Teacher: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
Millie: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet".
Teacher: George Washington not
only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted
it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
Louis: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me
frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
Simon: No sir, I don't have to, my Mum is a good cook.
Teacher: Clyde, your composition
on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy
Clyde: No, teacher, it's the same dog.
Teacher: Harold, what do you call
a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer
Harold: A teacher.
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Andrew DeFaria <Andrew@DeFaria.com>